Race of Dreams Round 2

     "Ok Crystal, the competition is going to be fierce," John said as we made sure I had everything I needed before I left to meet with the Virtue Groups.  "Just keep your head clear, remember you can form teams, and don't get killed."

     "Killed?  I thought that was against the rules," I said, shocked.

     "Accidents can happen," he said.  "Someone might use a little too much force in the fighting rounds.  But then again we have the Revival Team on standby in case anything happens."

     I wasn't sure if that was supposed to make me feel better or worse.  But I shook it off, hugged John, and stepped through the Corridor of Darkness to my destination.  The tunnel was dark and I had to trust that the portal was going to take me to the right place, but the Darkness didn't really bother me.  I felt so comfortable, embraced by the material that made up my very existence, the closest thing I had to a mother.  Without this beautiful Darkness, I would have never been born.  Then again, that was also more reason to hate Darkness.  It was no question that the universe would have been better off without me.  

     I exited the portal in the middle of a Native American camp.  I couldn't tell if I was taken back in time to Earth or if this was a separate world following a similar timeline at a slower pace.  I was thinking the latter to be more likely.  It was then that it hit me.  Nobody had told us what we were supposed to do once we arrived.  Though, I assumed Pocahontas would fill us in on the details, I still felt lost.  I scanned around the camp, looking for familiar faces and finding none.  Apparently Rainy and Lexil were assigned to other groups.

     I started to walk away, but I was startled to hear someone speak up behind me.  I turned to see a beautiful, dark-skinned woman who looked a few years younger than me.  "What's your name?" she asked.  

     "Oh, hi," I said.  "I'm Crystal."  This woman looked almost as lost as I did when I looked into her eyes.  "What's your name?  And do you have any idea what we're supposed to be doing here?  I guess Pocahontas will be here soon, but I have no idea what to do until then."

     "Mia," she said rather shortly.  I could tell she was wary of me, but I didn't understand why.  "Maybe we're just supposed to meet new people until she arrives?"

     "Sounds good to me," I said, smiling.  "Hey, I heard we can have small teams, so would you mind teaming up with me?  I don't know anyone in this group."

     Mia hesitated, clearly analyzing the best course of action.  "I suppose it couldn't hurt anything," she said, biting her lip.

     "Great," I said.  "With the two of us, we both have a better chance of getting our wish when this is all over."  What I didn't say, however, was that I was reconsidering my wish.  Originally, I wanted my body back, but I'd been considering if that was the best thing to do.  I wondered if a better wish would be to have never existed at all.

     Miya seemed to not notice my inner turmoil.  "And what would your wish be?" she asked.  

     "I…want my original body back.  This body you see…it's not my real one.  Some things happened about twenty years ago and I lost it.  My heart has been living inside my friend's body all this time," I said.  I mentioned nothing of the X-blade or Kairi because I was unsure of her relation to her, and I didn't want to go screwing up with my partner before we even got to work together.  "So, what's your wish?"

     Mia looked up to the sky.  "My husband…and my daughter," she said, trying to hide her emotions.  She appeared to be so lost in thought that she trailed off with her sentence.  "I wonder if they still…"

     "Still do what?" I asked.  "Mia, I can tell by looking at you that you're no stranger to pain.  I know we don't know each other well, but is there anything you wanna talk about?  I'm all ears. Who is your husband, anyway?"  I put my hand on her shoulders and looked deep in her eyes.  I saw she was trying to hide it, but Mia was hurting so much.

     My gesture startled Mia.  "My husband, Riku," she said.  "And my daughter, Rika."  Mia bit her lip and appeared to be choking back her tears.  "I…I left them."

     "Mia..." I said, bewildered by her revelation that she abandoned Riku and their daughter.  What had caused her to leave them?  "I've left people I love too. My Master...my last words to him were full of rage and I was so disrespectful to him.  So I know how you must be feeling.  And you must still love Riku and Rika if your wish is about them.  Have you tried going back and apologizing to them?  I know Riku, at least in my world, and he is a good man.  I'm sure he'd forgive you given the time.

     "I can't go back," she muttered with a small smirk before bursting out laughing.  "I can never go back!  I left them.  He begged me, you see?  He begged for me to stay, got on his knees and all.  Practically had to kick him off my leg, the annoying little bugger.  He couldn't just let me leave.  Was crying, him, being a grown man, crying!"  She shook her head, her tears streaming from her eyes.  "Thank goodness Rika didn't wake up...I wouldn't be able to face her..."

     "Mia, I don't know what to say," I said.  Hysteria had taken over my partner and all I could do was sit there and watch.  "Why did you hurt him so badly?  I mean, it doesn't change what I think of you, but I still don't understand.  You had a daughter, a husband who loved you.  Your life seemed great.  Something had to happen.  People don't leave for no reason."  Mia just left her family?  I'd have killed to have what she abandoned.

     "Because I'm too broken to be fixed, that's why," she said with a small giggle.  She sighed, running a hand through her hair.  "So I suppose here's my wish: That no matter what happens to me, that Riku and Rika will always be safe.  Because I'm a horrible person, leaving them behind.  And I need to at least know they're going to be okay."

     "Mia first off, you're not a horrible person.  I know people FAR more messed up than you'll ever be," I said.  "My father is Xehanort, ok?  I KNOW messed up.  I'm related to messed up.  In fact, if I come near a Princess of Heart, then everyone in a thousand miles is screwed because Darkness possesses me easily.  Second, what shows me that you aren't horrible is because you still care about them.  Yeah, you screwed up.  Big time.  But you didn't do it because you're bad.  In fact, you probably thought by leaving you were doing them a favor because you said you're too broken to be fixed.  That shows you still care, and also because your wish is for them to be safe."  I took a breath after the long rant to her.  I of all people had the least right to judge her for what she'd done.  "You wanna know whose heart I've been in for the past twenty years?  Kairi's.  I possessed her, nearly killing us both, and ruined her life.  She acts like it doesn't bother her, but having to live in the new body we created, the body of the X-blade wielder, hurts her beyond belief.  And it's all my fault."

     Mia looked at me and smirked.  "I don't have  a father, dear.  I was created.  I was used as a test subject.  I can handle more Darkness than a regular Nobody ever could.  I'm just a puppet brought to life by a madman.  I have no heart, no anything.  Just memories.  I can't feel, don't you understand?"  She grabbed my hand and placed it on her chest just above her heart.  "My memory is merely some chip that was placed in my head and stores what I see and hear.  I can remember everything so vividly—even if I want to forget—because it's all up here," she said, pointing to her head.  "Things will never change for me.  I'll be a broken doll all my life, or whatever you call wandering the worlds for a never-ending amount of time."

     My heart broke for Mia as her situation sounded so familiar.  "Mia, I know how that feels, being a tool used by evil.  I was created too.  My whole purpose in life was to replace Vanitas.  I live with the fact that I was never meant for any good every day.  Some days, I think about how much better things were if I never existed in the first place.  These past few days of the Race, I've been thinking of changing my wish to that.  Wishing I never existed."  I sighed and closed my eyes.  "Mia, you think you're alone, but you're not.  And honestly, I don't buy it that you have no heart.  The sheer fact that you feel guilt says otherwise."

     "Feelings are like a switch.  You can turn them either off or on, she said.  "But still…everyone is here for a reason.  We all have potential, but it's up to us whether or not we use that potential for good or evil."  Miya looked dead in my eyes and sighed.  "You still have your potential.  Mine's all withered, like a dead flower."

     Mia held so much self-hatred and it didn't seem any of my words were going to sink in.  I decided it would be best to leave her alone about the subject while our chances of working together effectively were still good.  "Well, we are all here for a reason.  You're right about that.  And I don't doubt for a minute you still love them.  But I'll leave you alone about it if your mind is set on this.  Let's go find a change of clothes and Pocahontas.  Between you and me, I think we stick out like sore thumbs here."  I looked down at my light blue tank top and jeans, then saw Mia's zip-up jacket and compared it to the people around us who were dressed in deer skin.  I'd also seen few settlers around.  If they saw us wearing pants, they were bound to burn us as witches.

     Mia sighed and nodded.  "A good idea, indeed.  It doesn't seem any of the others have gotten the idea yet, so why don't we have a quick peek around the settlements?" she said.  I knew exactly what that meant, "find something nobody would miss and steal it."

     The idea of wearing dress appalled me, but I knew I had to.  "Yeah, maybe there's someone aroun here who wouldn't miss a few dresses."  Mia and I split up for the time being to search for clothes.  With her darker skin tone, it only made sense for her to dress as one of the Natives and me, being the ghost I am, to dress as a settler.

     I left the Native American camp quietly and infiltrated the English village.  Seeing all the women in those dresses, I wondered how in the flying fudge nuggets I was going to begin to put one on.  I prayed they had shorter versions, but I had no such luck.  They were all like that because of some female skin=devil or something like that.  I had no idea.  But I did, however, eventually find an empty house with dozens of identical dresses.  I felt bad for having to steal one, but I doubted they had a department store anywhere.  Didn't have any money to pay for one anyway.

     I swiped the dress and took it out into the forest where I could change in peace.  I left my normal clothes in a hole in tree, where I would be sure it wouldn't get rained on or stolen.  Thankfully, when I slipped mine on, it wasn't so bad.  I'd chosen one of the thinner ones, so my mobility was intact.   And the thin fabric felt better against my skin than I thought it would.  I returned to the camp, hoping relations between the Natives and settlers hadn't deteriorated yet like I'd heard they had on Earth.

     I met up with Mia in the village.  "Oh wow, Mia.  I love your dress.  You look so pretty!" I said, half because I really did think that, and half to cheer her up.  "We can really blend in now."

     "Thanks," she said, shrugging indifferently.  "Let's go find the others.  Pocahontas must be nearby or something."

     "Alright," I said.  My attempt at cheering Mia up with the compliment seemed to have failed.  Why was I even trying again?


     Mia and I went deeper into the camp and met up with Pocahontas.  "Welcome, competitors in the Race of Dreams.  It is an honor to be able to train you in Trust and Having an Open Mind for your trials to come.  If you have already divided yourselves among the teams, then I would like to get started with your lessons."

     Mia and I listened intently to Pocahontas explain the various things we would be doing together.  "Hey, you look nice too," Mia said.

     I was a little startled, not expecting Mia to say anything.  "Oh, thanks Mia," I said.  I smiled at her and followed Pocahontas with the rest of the group.  As much as my partner hated herself, I hoped I could at least help heal her heart even though mine was broken beyond repair as well.